Sunday, January 23, 2011


Everyone have something that they hold dear.
Everyone have something that they are extra sensitive about.
Everyone will react differently on those sensitive issues.
Everyone have different level of acceptance.

When someone you hold dear,
talks about you (in a bad way) or compare you (to something or someone which you obviously are not like that at all) or treats you in a way which is way off your level of acceptance. How would you feel? Hurt? Angry? Despair? Confused? What would you do? Fight back? Tell them how you feel? Keep your silence?

I am a very simple person.
I put my family first in everything. And at the same time, within this family, there are things that make me feel unease sometimes. Of course, it happens in every family. There are not a single family which have no problem at all. Even if I point out the problem, the situation will not change. The problems is here to stay. I can only live with it. So, how do I feel? I feel congested with mixtures of feeling and sometimes I would break down without any pillars to support me. So, what can I do? Find a corner which I can hide and cry.

Being the youngest son with a younger sister,
I am one that holds no privilege whatsoever at home. Simon is the eldest son and usually, in Chinese tradition, the eldest son is more favourable to the parents. Kelvin is the smartest one whom have the highest achievement, he is the pride of the family. Samantha is the youngest and only daughter at home, obviously she's pampered most and thus, have the worst attitude. Where do I come in? Probably "just another son"?

To attract my parents' attention,
I have to do things that my siblings will not do. I pushed myself to excel in many ways. I help my parents to do all the things that my siblings don't usually do. For one instance, I am the only one who would bathe and feed the dog apart from my mom. Another, I am the one who care enough to do check the garden out and cut branches. When the toilet bowl is non-functioning, who will fix it? *all fingers point at me* At school, I wanted to be the best in everything I do. St. John, prefect, Interact, etc etc. I love to be the son that my parents can proudly brags about. At the end of the day, I failed to do so. Not only I was not the top brass in extra curricular activities, I screwed my SPM examination.


For that,
my sis never show respect. If it was Kelvin, she'll gladly listen to him without complains. Whenever I give her advice (even in a mild manner), she'll show me disrespect. Even the youngest in the family treats me that way. Mom and dad will side her most of the time. If not, both of us will be scolded. However, I am used to it. What can I complain? I have a home, I have a family and I have a life. It wouldn't be home if things are different. Probably I am destined to be the timid character in the family?

If they have said anything that hurts,
just swallow it whole like an oyster straight down the throat and don't fret about it. Some things should not be said and even if it is said, I just have to live with it. That is life as we know it.

1 comment:

  1. my counselor used to tell me tat mostly the middle child in a family will be neglected, becoz parents usually put hope on the 1st child & worry bout the youngest....but u hav to know tat everyone has their difficulty in a family...v hav to tolerate all the time... try to voice out if possible...u r the best of yrself, dun stress yrself too much...