I should really give myself 3 big slaps.
One for procrastinating.
One for my ignorance.
One for my immaturity.
With that 3 big slaps, I hope to put all these away. Grow up. See myself from a different point of view. Change my habits and reliance on Kelvin.
One of the most important thing,
step out of Kelvin's shadow. Stop comparing myself with him. Accept the fact that each individual is unique. Not one man can be identical to another. Cut the crap on "I must win Kelvin". That's too naive and childish. Stop relying on him. He can't be there for me all the time. I need to shape my own life.
From this day on,
I shall learn from my mistakes. Stop being lazy and take initiatives. Get things done on my own. Stop sitting around and wait for opportunity to come. I'm feeling that my motivations are coming back. Leave the past and aim for a brighter future.
List to be done;
1) secure a scholarship
2) keep myself updated with my field of studies
3) be more independent
Thanks to Kelvin for giving me a scolding.
I will try to reflect on my wrongs.